WEDC Gift Guide 2022

My way is better than your way

by | Jun 3, 2022 | Opinion

I enjoy going to places by myself.

I can go solo to a restaurant and not worry that someone is going to feel sorry for me or think I don’t have friends. When I was single, I loved going to the movies all alone.

In fact, I developed the perfect system, so get a pen ready. First, I’d pick an early showing so there would be fewer people in the theater.

I only drink a handful of sodas a year, so it was a special treat for me to get one at the movies. I’d get a small popcorn with a box of whoppers and mix them together. Sugar and sweet combine with such wonder that it would make me want to run into a wall and render myself unconscious.

I walk all the way up to the top without turning left or right and that is where I park it. No one kicks your chair and you can stretch your legs in the aisle. That is the perfect way to see a movie. 

I remember the first movie I went to with my now-wife Jazen.

It was 1999 (as the Prince song enters your mind) and we went with a group of friends. She was late so I got her a ticket and waited while the others went in. A smooth move to be sure. Backfired though, she still hasn’t paid me back. Anyway, though everyone was sitting in the wrong place, it was a good time.

With that in mind, I wonder what would’ve happened if we went to a movie on our first date and we did things “our way.” It may have not been pretty. I can see it now: “Jazen, what do you mean that we should sit in the middle?”  “Ray, why do you want to go at 10:00 a.m.?” “Jazen, are you really sure you want a sip of one of the few sodas I’ll have this year?” I think that if we picked this as our first date…well, yeah. We’ll chalk it up to divine intervention that it was a good while before we saw another movie together. It gave me time to get used to quirks like her wanting to have some of my popcorn and whopper mixalicious.  

The reality is, when we met, I had a way I liked to do things, so did she. So, what if our relationship just became about whose ways won out over the other? Well, that sounds like it’d be pretty foolish.

But isn’t that what so many of us do whether it is with a spouse, a friend, a coworker or even a stranger.

We feel that our way is right, makes sense and is just plain better. As a result, relationships are torn apart by surface-level things like how the thermostat should be set.

We would often rather be right than our relationships be right. 

I could go on, but I’ll close with this.

The best steps Jazen and I have ever taken happened when one of us went ahead and let go of “our way.” And the only reason we’ve ever done this is because we follow a God who tells us this is the better way. We just feel He knows better than us even when our actions seem to say otherwise.

In a manner of speaking, I guess I could’ve just stayed with my perfect way of seeing movies. The thing is, I just want something better than my way. Don’t you? 

By Ray Miranda

Veterans

0 Comments

Related News

Thankful for old friends

Thankful for old friends

It’s Thanksgiving week, a great time to reflect, give thanks, or in other words, gratitude.  I’m thankful for so much this season.  One thing in particular is a reconnection with an old friend. We’ve all got those people in our lives, that for a season were...

read more
Know beans about chili

Know beans about chili

“Oh, waiter. There’s a bean in my chili.” So goes the encounter every Southerner dreads when he orders a bowl of red and is served chili with beans. There are certain missteps in the South that are unforgivable. Asking a girl out without clearing it first with her...

read more
Your friends can make all the difference

Your friends can make all the difference

I write this from my chemo chair as I undergo another day or treatment in my cancer journey. I’m blessed by friends who drive me to treatment and rides back home. The treatment itself is lonely. I sit in the chair while they hang bag after bag of meds for infusion...

read more
The Fouke Monster

The Fouke Monster

When I was a kid in the early 1970s, the Fouke Monster was around every corner. At least, that was how I saw things as a 10-year-old. For those who aren’t familiar with this Sasquatch-like creature, the Fouke Monster allegedly roamed (some say, still roams) the river...

read more
Don’t forget to remember

Don’t forget to remember

I didn’t want to do it. It had been on my calendar awhile and as it got closer, I wanted to be part of it less and less. You know what that's like, don’t you? We only have so many open spaces on our calendar and when there is something on there that we don’t want to...

read more

A Pizza History

The old question, “Where would you go first if you had a time machine?” is an easy one to answer for me. I’d visit all of my favorite long-since-gone childhood cafes, diners, and restaurants. Not all, but one stop may soon be possible, without the help of H.G. Wells....

read more

Taking the fall

You meet people in the South who like spring, summer or winter, but virtually everyone below the Mason Dixon Line loves fall. I can speak to my affinity for the fall season, which in Ashdown, Arkansas, is at least three weeks. Four if you’re lucky. Fall is that time...

read more

The screening process

Movies were better in a theater. A theater filled with people. Such was the case before the internet. Before HBO. Before people holed up in their living rooms and away from their neighbors and friends. A time when pay-per-view meant you bought a ticket to watch a...

read more
Which is more powerful, influence or authority?

Which is more powerful, influence or authority?

We’re solidly into an election season where people are making plenty of claims regarding how they are more of an authority on issues. They suppose being an authority or having authority is a winning track.  What if authority isn’t the greatest asset for a leader?...

read more
Remember to remember

Remember to remember

How good is your memory? I remember many years ago laughing at my grandmother because she would leave one room and go into another and forget why she went into that room. Well, I’m not laughing anymore because I often experience that myself nowadays! It’s a normal...

read more